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Pearls of Wisdom

Before my failed near-fatal suicide attempt on October 23, 2003, I accepted the abuse that I allowed others to bestow on me. It took me a lifetime to discover that people do not scar or give you pain. It was my acceptance of their mistreatment. I blame myself for not being able to heal from the hurt and the scars that I now realize were self-inflicted. I found that self-pity was one of my greatest weaknesses. Self-pity doesn't do anyone any good. We are all much stronger than we initially think when something bad happens in our life.

"What happens is not as important as how you react to what happens." - Thaddeus Golas

One of my favorite short poems is written by D.H. Lawrence, a poem that reminds me that as a human I have free will that allows me to move forward by overcomimg my self-pity.


I never saw a wild thing
sorry for itself.
A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough
without ever having felt sorry for itself.

- D.H. Lawrence

"The ability to be in the present moment is a major component of mental wellness." - Abraham Maslow

Life's experiences are not woven with a constant thread; Life in our world is constantly changing. We must repurpose what we have endured and the lessons we have learned; creating a renewed sense of hope. Life is what it is. The question is... What are you willing to do to change your life?

Changes or events that happen in your life can be fixed or healed with a positive mental attitude. A choice. But when your life is over; it never comes back and you'll never know you could have made it to where you once thought was impossible. Again, a choice. Most people that have had suicidal thoughts do change their minds and later in life think. What was I thinking. I almost gave up my life.

"What we have to remember is that we can still do anything. We can change our minds. We can start over." - Marina Keegan, The Opposite of Loneliness

Challenges, hardships and obstacles are part of what life's journey is all about. You are not always in control of what happens to you, but you are in control how you react to it. You can allow your experiences to destory you or redefine you. How you view your life will help you to survive. No one can defeat you. You can only defeat yourself. It takes courage to be able to deal with life's sudden changes. If you face your challenges, hardships, and obstacles with a positive mental attitude. You will find that it takes half the effort to overcome them. The sum of your challenges, hardships, and obstacles will define your human spirit and can become your strength.

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"It was hard. I came to grips with a lot of difficulties that I've overcome. Each challenge kind of makes you who you are. It wasn't always a good thing. I have my own struggles in my life because of the things I was forced to overcome." - Hope Solo

"If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere." - Frank A. Clark

Now, I walk away from abuse. If you are a survivor like me and others like me, you will not be held captive by fear, anxiety or depression. Just be fearless. It might be your only way to save yourself from fear. Fear can consume you and spit you out dead. Feeling paralyzed with fear is not an option. Love heals and forgiveness removes fear. Forgiving others who have hurt you will help you heal.

What I have learned from my personal experience can give you hope. You are not alone and you are not forgotten. Your life will improve. Peace is for those who seek it. I believe that you too will find wisdom in the pearls that have washed ashore as a result of my hurricanes and count yourself a survivor.

"Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear not absence of fear." - Mark Twain

"Life's journey often requires great courage to overcome our greatest fears." - Brian Good

"Fear is what stops you... courages is what keeps you going." - unknown author

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